Saturday, April 28, 2012

Top things to ban


I use to be a smoker and for many years I didn’t mind people smoking around me. Even after I gave up, I never became one of those “anti-smoking” ex-smokers. But it soon became evident to me how disgusting this habit can be, especially when you came home from a night out smelling like an ashtray!

And then the anti-smoking campaigns brought legislation is several countries against smoking in public places and I have to admit that it was a bliss not to have to continue smoking, albeit, in a passive way, and coming home smelling like a chimney. So the banning of smoking in public places was a good thing, and it has helped in decreasing the number of smokers and reducing the risk of passive smoking for those who never smoked.

It is always hard to ban things that are part of our life. But once you get use to it you find it actually improves the quality of our lives. So I wanted to write an article to share with you some of the things I think we should ban to make everyone’s life a little bit better. I am sure everyone has their “top things I would ban” that makes everyone’s life a misery, so I propose that everyone should declare these, and may be we can all make this a better world!

First thing to ban…

People with big hair do in cinemas.

This has been in my top list for years! And this should be treated just like smoking; it’s bad for your health as you end up with a stiff neck! I am sure everyone has been a victim of someone’s big hair do at the cinema or theatre and have had to suffer missing the film as you fight to get a sight of the screen. This is my children’s biggest fear, more than the dark itself, every time we go to the cinema; for a child to have someone whose hair will block their view of the screen is not a laughing matter! So I propose that a ban is introduce to stop people with “big hair do” going to the cinema, or at any rate either flatten it or sit right at the back!

Now, some of you may share this pain with me… second thing to ban…

Reclining seats during the day in an airplane.

Now, this may not seem as important to many but as a frequent traveler with a hobby (writing) often when I travel I take the opportunity to write. I don’t travel business class and most airplanes have been designed to use as much of the space as possible to get passengers in, so you have just about enough room to take your laptop out and tinkle away on the keyboard. I do understand that in a night flight people want to sleep, but what is it with people reclining their seats during the day? This is the time when people want to work and do stuff, not sleep! And besides, sleeping in a plane has never been comfortable so why would you want to torture yourself by reclining your seat and getting a stiff neck? I think airplane designers should add an extra feature to new airplanes; you cannot recline the seat until it’s dark, a bit like your automatic lights in modern cars. Or make it as part of the safety announcements the airhostess so much hate “may we remind passengers that the use of electronic items is strictly forbidden during take off and landing and that you must not recline your seat during the day!”

Next, and perhaps one that causes the most misery in everyone’s life is…

Low cost Airlines that are not low cost.

Now surely most of us have logged onto these airlines’ websites with big banners that say “Rome for 99p” or “Athens for 2 for 10 pounds” Most of us know that there is a slight chance that this may be true but there is also a much likelier chance that this is not true. Typically these airlines call themselves low cost and they should be banned, because there is nothing low cost about them except perhaps low cost for them to run as they have cut every corner to meet their margins and produce profits whilst openly deceiving their passengers. The fair may be 99p, but you have to add taxes, which are higher than usual, as these airlines need to pay other sub charges that normal airlines don’t have to. So how do they make their money if they are low cost? All the extras, which by the time you finish adding them, it’s the cost of a regular ticket with a decent airline. So I maintain, these “low cost” airlines should be ban as this is not a true statement.  We would ask a politician to resign form his post in parliament if he openly lied, so why not stop them too! (you can tell I don’t like them right?)

I am an extrovert and I do like a chat, but this next item really should be banned!

Small talk from Taxi Drivers.

I don’t know about you but getting into a taxi and have the driver talk to you endlessly about the weather is not my idea of a fun trip. Particularly when your taxi is at 5 am and all you want to do is stare out of the window! I like talking to people, when I have something interesting to say, but random conversations in a taxi seem to be a complete waist of time and energy. “Wow it’s cold out there this morning”, well of course it is! It’s 5 am and it’s winter! What did you expect! To make my point, compare this with a pilot in an airplane. Imagine you have settle into your seat and the plane has taken off and all of the sudden you hear the pilot through the speakers say “lovely weather we are having for this time of the year” surely you’d think this is odd… and then he continues to talk endless chat which really doesn’t interests you; “those clouds are fluffier that usual…”, well it is the same thing! You get on a taxi to be driven form A to B, that’s all! Just like they put stickers in their taxis saying “No Hot Food” we should have the right to put a sticker in their taxi that says “No Small Talk” All taxi drivers who talk endless chit chat should be ban!

This next one must not be ignored and everyone should work hard to enforce the ban!

People fating in confined public spaces!

Isn’t this the same as smoking? Surely it is bad for your heath! This is one that you will agree with me, makes everyone’s life just a little bit harder. And if we banned people from releasing gasses in confined public spaces we will be able to enjoy our time much better when we are forced to share our personal space with others. You know what I am talking about, trains, cars, airplanes, cinemas and elevators; even though you know freedom is only a few floors away!  I do not deny the fact that occasionally an accidental gas may escape us in a place we would not normally do this, that’s ok, as long as that is what it is, just the one, accidental fart. But I am talking about the serial killers, the “let’s just get it all out” people who feels the need to empty their valves whilst sitting next to you! Those people should be banned and place outside in a cabin next to the smokers. So I long for the day I will hear someone say, “Fancy a fart? Let’s go outside”

When it comes to banning people from a place, this is one that should take priority…

Overly fit and well build people in Gyms

I started going to the Gym a couple of years ago. This was as a result of some pictures I saw of me at my sisters wedding. And I do enjoy now my regular visits to the gym, mainly whilst I travel and at 6 am. There are 2 reasons why I go to the gym at 6 am, which many people find insane.  First of all I am a morning person and I like getting up early. Second and perhaps the most important one, there are no fit people in the gym at this time of the morning! Even though I’ve been going to the gym for 2 years, I am an average build person who just wants to work out to stay fit. But like the rest of us, I usually feel intimidated by overly fit people who attend the gym. My argument here is simple, they are already too fit! They don’t need to be there! My routine at the gym consists of 25 minutes of cardio followed by 10 to 15 minutes of weightlifting, a very simple routine. I love doing it, except when I am running next to someone who is going twice as a fast as me and has hardly broken a sweat, or when I am trying to lift my 8 kilos dumb bell whilst the guy next to me is lifting 25 kilos in each arm!  You know what I am talking about, the stuff that makes you feel like you are not trying hard enough! But you are, they are way pass the trying hard stage. So let’s ban overly fit people from gyms or at least separate them in their own area where they can then intimidate each other whilst us average people can feel happy with our small achievements!

I could go on and on, there are so many other things I would ban to make our lives a little bit better; Talent shows that don’t look for talent (they are fun but shouldn’t call themselves talent shows), Automated answering services (they can drive you insane trying to get to the right person), Customer Service Lines that start with 0800 and 0845 numbers (you end up paying through the roof to complaint when it was their fault in the first place!) and many more.

All I am suggesting is to look for ways to making this a better world for all of us to live. Yes these things may not seem as important as banning smoking, but imagine the day when you sit to see a film and there is no big hair do in front of you and the atmosphere is fart free… wouldn’t that be something?

Remember, you need to voice your thoughts, so if you have things that make your life a misery, write about them, let people know what can make this a better place to live for you and me… maybe together we can change the world!