Week Nine 2015 – Redefining your focus

Our lives can be so busy we may loose sight of what our focus is and instead of achieving a lot we thin down our successes.

In case you didn’t notice (and this will prove the point of this blog) this is week nine of 2015 and I skipped week eight!  This was done on purpose and I needed to break the norm to find out what this is really all about. After the successful completion of my 52-week blog challenge last year, I began 2015 with the same pace of writing a weekly blog. This was partly due to a very positive comment from someone encouraging me to continue to write weekly, but also because it has become and habit and once a habit is formed it’s easy to continue doing something. I also added to my already fully packed bag of hobbies doing a video Vlog of my travels, inspired by my children who watch endless hours of videos in YouTube and the self indulgent Christmas gift I gave myself in the form of the famous Selfie Stick. So it was only appropriate to adopt this new task and produce this weekly video.

But last week, as I sat and edited my video Vlog and tried to look for inspiration to write my blog and I began to get that feeling that I was doing too much and accomplishing perhaps too little. This thought came into my head as I also stumbled upon an incomplete play I have been working on and never finished. I was really miffed when I opened the file and began to read the dialog and realised I had not finished giving life to the story and its characters and now going back was harder as I had lost the thread of the story and needed to re-read and re-think the idea. I had been so busy writing weekly blogs and video Vlogs that I had forgotten I was working on this script. And to top up all these feelings I watch the Oscars thinking “I’ll never get there if I don’t focus on trying to write that golden nugget that will get me to Hollywood” If I am too busy with lots of little projects I will struggle to get anything big done.

So I put the proverbial pen a paper down and decided to redefine my focus. Whilst I really enjoyed the challenge of writing every week I needed to think about what my focus as a writer is. Apart from the fact that I guess you do run out of subject to write every week and I have added the video Vlogs to my repertoire which I also enjoy doing, all this drove me to neglect my script writing which at the end of the day is where my real passion (and I think my talent) really is. Wanting to be in the limelight and doing so much has made me realise I have so much to give but at the end I am just churning stuff to get it out there. I felt a bit like a reporter of a dally newspaper having to meet datelines and get my work out on time, which at the end of the day takes away the pleasure of what I do and why I do it.

So I have made a conscious decision to continue to bring to you my blogs but not in such a prescriptive manner, I guess just like I did before 2014, I want to write about experiences I see and come across as and when they emerge rather than trying to find these so that I can meet a dateline to get this to you. I know my loyal and trusty readers and follower won’t mind to get my blogs less often combined with video Vlogs and the occasional script or short story (in fact you may be glad you don’t have to read my stuff every week! J) So from now own, some weeks you may get a Vlog, or a Blog or a short story, a script or just simply a note keeping you up to date with my work.

Taking time out is a valuable lesson we should all keep in mind particularly when we feel we have lost our sense of purpose or direction. Sometimes stepping back and re-examining what we do will demonstrate that somewhere along the line we got side tracked, or derailed or even distracted from the real purpose and meaning of our passion, our focus, of the things we really enjoy in life. I encourage you to take time off, like me, to redefine your purpose, your goals, and your focus.  Life is a destination and there are many roads that lead us to the end, but if we loose ourselves by taking to many avenues, we end up in the dirt track with no real direction or clear view of our end goal. I’m off to finish that script I never completed and start the next project, who knows, this may be the one that gets me that ticket to the red carpet one day!

Week Five 2015 – You are only as old as you feel!

You are only as old as you feel!

Can you believe we are on week five of 2015? And how time flies when you are having fun… and I don’t look a day older!

This week I’m going to talk about age and the subject of how old you feel and look. It is a subject I think we are all affected by and an important part of our lives. The well-known classic fairy tale of Peter Pan is perhaps the best story ever told about how a human should live his life. The whole plot can be summarised as follow:

The story of a man who knew how to live his life - by staying young! He was able to do grown up things that he liked (fighting with swords and staying up late) but be childish at the same time. He was fit and in shape by running, climbing, laughing and a bit of flying. The moment he saw he would grow old by doing other grown up things he didn’t like (marrying Wendy and getting a job to pay the car, having kids, a mortgage and a dog and be miserable eating too much food and drinking to drown his sorrows) he ran away and remained youthful for the rest of his life.

Ok that’s a cynical view of the story but I think there’s some truth in my version of the plot. Think about it; how old do you feel? And does that reflect on your appearance? How about your attitude and the way you behave? More often than not, the way we feel affects the way we look and therefore if you feel 100 years old you will look 100 more! When I was a child I grew up believing that 60 years old was very old! I guess my grandmother’s generation had a harder life and by the time they hit their 60s they were already looking tired and feeling very old. And this image of someone being old at the age of 60 has always hunted me, even though I see now plenty of evidence that when you reach that stage of your life you are still very young. With the right attitude, staying fit and looking after yourself, you can look even younger.

Amazing Joan Collins!

Emmanuel looking great!

This week I watched in the news some of the Red Carpet events (it’s awards season!) and they featured Joan Collins in an amazing black sequence dress with a leg slit all the way to her hips. In the clip she looked an amazing mature woman and when the presenter mentioned she was 82 years old I nearly fell off my chair! Has she had some help from the knife? For sure but even with a little help from her surgeon, her health, her attitude and conviction that she is still a beautiful young woman is what made her look like in her 60’s! I also found out this week that the Mexican Pop Idol “Emmanuel” is just about to turn 60 and this also astonished me, same story, he looks amazing and you would never thing he was more than 50. His looks, attitude and thirst for staying current make him look not just young but contemporary.

And I myself was the subject of looking young this week. Two people mention I did not look my age (I’m turning 48 this year and both said I looked 40) Apart form being a massive complement it also made me think about how I feel; I don’t feel 48, I feel 30 and this is driving my physical appearance to be much younger. I have always felt young, I’m a bit of a Peter Pan, I enjoy being a grown up as well as a youth. The difference is I have taken on all the responsibilities that perhaps Peter Pan ran away from (the marriage, kids, car, mortgage, job) as they complement my life and create a balance. It’s good to feel young and do crazy things, but you also need that stability and maturity in your life, that doesn’t mean I have to look or feel old!

There is no denying that loosing weigh has also contributed to shaving off some years, Peter Pan kept fit all the time, and staying fit has given me an extra burst of energy associated with being young. And staying healthy then drives your mental attitude; to feel young you must also stay mentally young and you will look young. Then you start to dress young. My wife often has to drive me away from the teenage section in the department stores, as I keep on looking at cloths that my son wears (him and I are almost the same height and I started to borrow some of his stuff, how embarrassing! For him of course!) Hey, if you can wear it and look good in it, then why not!

I don’t think you have to pretend to be a teenager to feel young, or suddenly loose all sense of responsibility and give up all your achievements and accomplishments to be young again. I think the secret to feeling young is to believe you are still young. Age is an attitude and what you make it. You can be 100 years old, if you keep mentally and physically fit, you can continue to enjoy life to the max and not become a stereotypical person of your age. At 47, with a family and a mortgage, I do have to act responsibly, people relay on me, but that does not stop me from keeping a young heart and healthy mind and body and an attitude that allows me to look much younger than I really am.

So it’s time to shave off some years, look at your attitude and not your age. Keep healthy and start believing that you can do anything you want, your age is just a number on your birth certificate!

Week three 2015 – Small achievements!

Many years ago my father told me that a modest but talented composer when asked how he felt about being number one he replied “I hate it”. Astonished by the answer the interviewer asked him why and he said “there are too many number one’s in the world”

What he was referring to was that for him was more important to be the best at what he does and not just number one. That idea has always lingered in my head and you see this play out every day in our lives. Often the winners of talent shows go on to become famous, for a while, and then vanish in the limelight. One Direction, whether you like them or not, have become a very successful boy band and they were not the winners of the X-Factor proving that this composer was right, there are too many number ones, but it’s the ones behind them you need to watch out for!

This week the results for the NYC Midnight Screenplay Challenge came out and I did not reach the top five to move onto the third round.  It is always disappointing when you don’t reach the next stage of a competition but I am happy to take away the experience, which I enjoyed and learned from it. And as I looked at the results, although I was not on the top five, I was pleased to see I had not come bottom of the league! In the voting system the judges gave points to 15 scripts (out of 28 competitors), from 1 to 15 (a bit like the Eurovision Song Competition) in the two rounds and the top five writers with the most cumulative points went through the third round. In the first set of voting I didn’t get any points but with my second script I was awarded two points, putting me second to last and one of 20 writers with points (there were some that had no points at all!) and this made me very happy!

I know you are sitting there reading this thinking “What?” but I am using the same principle as the one described by the composer my father told me about. In life you need to maintain a positive attitude when you are passionate about something, to keep you going and never give up! Yes I may have not been on the top five who went to the next round, but at least I had two points (I would have really hated not to have any) and I was not the last of the writers with points! Second to last is already one more than someone else and closer to the top! As they say there is always a silver line in every cloud!

And in life everything is about not just wanting to be number one, but to be the best at what you do. I also think it is a matter of opinion and taste when it comes to judging someone’s work. Whilst we all accept feedback and work with it to make us better, more often than not it is someone’s opinion and may not be share by many. Part of the process in this competition was to receive personalised feedback from one of the judges about your work, a very unique thing as often in this competitions they find it impossible to give everyone who enters personal feedback. I welcomed this as I love understanding where I can improve to make me a better writer. I may not always agree with everything, but someone’s opinion can only help you improve.

I wanted to share with you all this experience to get you all to think of the importance of always looking for that silver line in every cloud. I think we should all strive to be number one, of course, but at the same time to enjoy being number two, knowing that we are the best at what we do. And to accept valuable feedback even if it may not seem right, remember perception is reality and this is someone’s reality and others may share it. And whilst as a writer I know it is hard to appeal to every audience, I must strive to reach as many people as I can with my stories.

I will let you be the judge of that. This week I invite you as part of reading this blog to take a look at the two scripts I wrote. They are only 5 pages long (5 minutes of dialog) and two very contrasting stories. Keep in mind the challenge we had – to write a screenplay in 48 hours with three things in mind – the Gen, a place and an object. As you read these visualise them on the screen. I welcome any feedback you have, I would love to hear from some of you and compare your thoughts with that of the judges in the competition. I write these scripts for audiences and not for judges, so I am intrigued to see what some of you think.

Below the links to the two scripts, all you need is 10 minutes (five minutes each) and a glass of wine! Enjoy reading them and please let me have your thoughts.

(click on the title to read the script)

MidnightRunner – a horror story set in a Barn with a padlock as the object

TheView – a romance story set in an office with a cigar as the object

For other scripts and stories go to www.sergiosnyder.com

Week Fifty-two – The end is only the beginning.

52 weeks later here I am typing my last blog of 2014 having achieved my goal and feeling very proud of myself! But this is only the end of a new beginning.

So this is it, fifty-two blogs done, each and everyone of them unique and an account of my day-to-day life and experiences as I travelled and dealt with all sort things that got thrown at me. And the more I think about it, the more I realise that the challenge I set my self was not about being able to write but to be able to see the world and draw from it to share experiences and situations that hopefully would have, in some way or another, helped you all.

And I don’t want to make this week, the last week, an exception. I knew I would have plenty of material to write about, with Christmas in it and a large family gathering, so I wanted to find something interesting or cleaver to write. I have been thinking about it all week, I really want to make week fifty-two special, in away I want to go out with a “big-bang”. But the more I’ve been thinking about it, the harder it has become to come up with anything good to write.

Yes I could give you a run down of the large family gathering we had, 24 people in a house we hired to celebrating Christmas. It was fun, chaotic and noisy! It made me realise that we are all Humans and what brings us together is tolerance and understanding and realising that without external influences (there was no Wifi, or mobile signal) there is a lot we have to share. This Christmas was no different to others with the exception of the setting, being away from home in an environment where we were all neutral. This was none’s house, and we were all guest. There was no communication with the outside world, so we had to stay focused on the moment. We went back to basics. But for me this isn’t the biggest learning this week, I don’t want week fifty-two to be about this.

So I continued to scratch my head thinking of that subject worthy of week fifty-two, after all this is the last week of my challenge. I thought I could give you all a round up of the year, in 2014 I learnt a lot. Many things happened with three mayor events taking the headlines - I suffered the loss of my father, been in hospital with a suspected heart attack and I run my first ever Half Marathon. But I guess you all know that right? I mean, if you have been following my blog and read some of the weeks you would have know this. As I asked myself these questions trying to decide if I should just do the “top ten moments of 2014” I came to realise that may be it is a good idea to do this, as some people may not have read some of these events.

But again, I decided not to do this! I didn’t want my last blog to be just a re-collection of what I had written about! In a way I thought that was cheating by just copying and pasting previous blogs.

I sat and I continued to scratch my head. What can I write about? What is so big, so important, and so meaningful in my life, that it should be the subject of my last blog? And then it finally came to me! And when it came it reminded me why I am doing this! Yet another epiphany! What have I learned this year? I have learnt that I can write, and I can write about anything I see in life. I have accomplished something extraordinary, which has allowed me to mature in my writing. And what does this mean? It means that I should continue to write and never give up. Now, a great dear friend of mine reminded me of this last week and of my motto “I write because someone out there reads”. She read blog fifty-one and commented, “Don't give up writing them.........NY resolution is to see if you can do another 52???? I love reading them” and I knew that this is what I need to do, I must continue, because some of you out there read what I write.

So I want to dedicate this blog to you all, the people for whom I write. For those of you who continue to support me and encourage me to write.  Writing is some times a very lonely job, and the satisfaction of writing something is knowing that someone has read what you have wrote.  As well as getting all my thoughts out on paper and express myself, I relish the thought of people enjoying and learning from what I put down every week in my blog. As a script writer I have always longed to have audiences enjoy a night out at the theatre, as a blogist I get satisfaction when I know people have twenty minutes where they enjoyed reading what I have to say.

Dear all out there that read my blog, I will endeavour to continue to share my experiences with you every week! And thank you for reading what I have to say, more to come in 2015!

So it is time to close the year; let us reflect on what we have achieved, and it is time to start planning what’s to come next.  My experience form this has been that we must all set ourselves a new challenge every year, I know I will, and stick to it, work on it and make sure we keep our promises to ourselves. Whatever you decide to do, it will help you be better, better in everything you do. I hope the last 52 weeks I have shared with you have been useful, and if anything at least entertaining, Remember the end of something is the beginning of something new.

Week fifty-one – Taking Stock.

Would you believe it? I have only one more to write before I reach my goal of writing a weekly blog for 2014! So it’s time to take stock and reflect on what I have done and achieved this year.

one of my proudest moments!

 As we all know, traditionally most people give themselves a “New Year’s Resolution” to help them change something in their lives, which in the previous year hasn’t work or they failed to achieve. These vary from “I will give up smoking” to “I will call mum every week” or the classic “I’ll loose some weight”. And all of these resolutions help us, at least for the first couple of months, to stay focus on something we really want to do or achieve.

And like everything in life, it is hard work! Soon after the resolution is made, we struggle to keep up with it. In the busyness of our every day life, we find ourselves over committed and this new thing is stretching us to the limits. Remember I have always said it is easier to say no than to say yes when it comes to going for a run or staying fit; but this philosophy applies to almost anything in our lives. Two months after our “new year’s resolution” most people generally have or start to dropped that self-commitment to improve or change something in their lives. It became easier to say no, and when you say it once, it becomes easier to say it again and again until you feel it’s time to move on and ditch the promise you made to yourself (or in some cases put it on hold until next year and try it again!)

So here I find myself writing blog number fifty-one of fifty-two blogs I committed myself to write this year. The challenge, if you remember and read blog number one, was to see if I could sustain writing on average a thousand words on different subject every week for the entire year. The idea was to challenge my ability as a writer and see if I have it in me to write so much, and to share with you all experiences and life learning lessons, which would then serve as the basis of a self book I could consider publishing in the future. It hasn’t been easy to do, I can assure you, and the time and effort that it takes to write these weekly blogs is tremendous. But one thing that has kept me going is the commitment I made to myself; It is almost as if I don’t want to let myself down by not writing one week (and I guess this is what is about, letting yourself down and no one else). I have had a feeling every week that if I don’t do the blog, the chain is broken, my challenge is lost and a piece would be missing therefore the challenge would be void.

Just like any of you who made commitments back in January this year, I have been tempted not to stick to my goal and give it up; many times too much work could have stopped me from writing any of the weeks, having been in hospital with a suspected heart attack would have been enough for anyone not to write that week, the death of my father, holidays, family commitments, or even the weeks where I had to really search for something to write as I faced a “writers block” right up to the last minute… and don’t forget preparing for my Half Marathon! Some many times it would have been easier to say “no I don’t have the time now, I’ll go back to it next week” But I focused on saying YES! Yes I can do it and yes I said I would do it, so get on with it and stop looking for reasons not to do it! Often your time is better spent looking for reason to do it and not on reason why not to do it.    

I had a great year, and I think I have accomplished a lot. These fifty-one weeks have helped me become a better person. And I don’t know if it is because to some extent I have been documenting my life that I feel I can look back and really relish on what I have accomplished, what I did, what I learned and what I will take away from all these experiences.

As I write this words I am also starting to wonder, what will I write next week? This very philosophical and reflective blog should have been week fifty-two, the final one, yet here I am rounding up my year with one more week to go. But you know what? This is exactly what I am talking about; now that I got it out of my system, week forty-one, I guess you could say “look none will mind or know if you don’t write a blog next week, anyhow you will be in Christmas mode, and enjoying the festivities” but I cannot stop, not on the last hurdle! So I am sure I will find an interesting subject to write about; anyhow the festive season always gives plenty of material to write about, specially with all the family together in one room! I bet you can’t wait till next week for the final chapter of my 2014 challenge!

I hope this week has inspired you to start thinking about your 2015 New Year’s resolutions and this time really stick to them! No matter what you want to do, achieve or change, remember that the key is to stay strong and don’t give in to the temptation that is saying no; no I won’t do it today, this week or this month. Next thing you know you have broken that commitment, you have let yourself down and broken that chain. Stick to it, work at it and you will see the marvellous effect of believing you can do anything you want to, it just takes that magic word to do it… YES.

Why not label 2015 as your year of YES – your Yea of Excellence and Self-discovery!

Week Forty-nine – Highs & Lows!

One minute you are up, then the next you are down; life can be such a roller coaster!

Have you ever got out of bed and felt like you were right on top of the world? Some times we do, we “get out of bed on the right side” and we feel the world is at our feet. Some times we also have important events which we work hard for and when you reach the end result and you’ve done a good job, again you feel on top of the world; what a lovely feeling that is, the “Highs” in our lives.

But on the other side some times we also encounter the “Lows” that brings us right back down and you may even hit “rock bottom”. These events often take place right at the start of our day, and we get that feeling of “getting out of bed on the wrong side” setting us off to have a series of disasters which makes our day get worse and worse. We may even look for the 3^rd event to take place so we can get out of this bad patch; you know, the “things come in three” feeling.

We all go through these feelings and emotions in our lives; it’s part of being a human. But have you ever experienced Highs and Lows on the same day? Yes I am talking about hitting high and low in 24 hours, and I mean very high and then rock bottom! If you’ve never experienced this, it can be emotionally draining and leave you feeling completely disoriented! One moment is good and then it all goes bad! So how do you deal with this? How do you keep your wits about you and survive? Not easy as it all happens too quickly and that feeling of disorientation and dizziness lingers for a long time. I guess it’s what they call in show business “your 15 minutes of fame”; one moment you are the talk of town and then no one wants to know you!

So if think you’ve never experience this before let me give you some examples to help you understand what I am talking about. I guess the most obvious one would be when you get some good news in the morning follow by bad news! You get that phone call from your boss informing you will be getting a pay rise for all your hard work and dedication to the company; you hit a High here. And then you get a call from home to let you know the house is flooded and it’s not covered by your insurance! You’re on a Low now. That would be a real rollercoaster of emotions all in a very short space of time!

We often experience this at work too; I know I have. You’ve been working hard on a piece of work or a project, which you hand in and get praised for the excellent effort. At that moment you feel good, accomplished and ready to take on the world! You are on top of your game and you can’t get enough of it! And then boom! Something goes wrong, you make a mistake, something that should have been done or looked at was not and now you find yourself having to own up to it and fix it! All the “high” from the good work you did is gone and you are scratching the bottom of the barrel trying to get out of the situation you find yourself in! You no longer have the glory but the guilt, no longer the praise but the questions, you now feel emotionally drained because your adrenaline has gone from very high levels of excitement to very high levels of stress and your body can’t take it any more! Talk about a rollercoaster! You have just been on one and you had a front row seat!

But you know what they say? Life is a rollercoaster and you have to ride it. Remember that which does not kill you can only make you stronger! To get through these emotions in one day and come out the other side in one piece you need to stay together and focus on the task ahead. Get off your high ride and focus on your low drive. At the end of the day you only have one option – fix it and move on. Don’t dwell on the past and what you could have done, that’s all gone.  Your passed successes are there to support your mistakes, don’t just ride on the glory days, but drive the tough times too. Everything is a balance, and ok you are now deep down, but surely someone will remember what you did this morning too!

That’s the balance in life; “Highs” and “Lows” are there to help you be better at what you do. Highs remind us of what we can do well and achieve, it is a way to re-charge the batteries and leave evidence that there is something good we have to offer. Lows help us remember we are also human and sometimes things will go wrong, we will make mistakes and we need to learn from them using the experiences to better ourselves. In a way the lows permit us to learn and produce more highs as a result of these experiences, they need to exits for highs to be created. Without one the other does not exist. I guess no one can ride a rollercoaster that only goes up, it will eventually run out of track and then you face a massive drop. I rather have lots of reasonable highs and lows to make it fun and more interesting!

I’m grateful for all the experiences I have in my life. Not only do they help me learn and become better but also they are great sources of inspiration for my writing! This is week forty-nine of my yearly blog challenge, I only have three more to write before I am done, and believe me when you have written forty-eight weeks, it seems that subjects are begging to dry up! Thank goodness for that rollercoaster called life with its Highs and Lows, without it I’d be thinking, “what am I going to write about this week?”