Welcome to the first blog of 2015, happy New Year and I hope you had a fantastic holiday season, whatever or wherever you’ve been. And if you were working and are on your way to celebrate, enjoy it!
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| Pantano Aguilar de Campoo - Spain |
I’ve spent the last two weeks in Spain where my wife comes from, and
some of my roots originate from. My mother was Spanish and came from a small
town near to my wife’s hometown. Coincidence or destiny brought us together
after my family had left Spain some 60 years before. We enjoy coming to Spain
and it is always good to see the family. Coincidently, my sister is married to
my wife’s brother and is now living in Spain, spooky!
I’m sure many of you are also returning form holidays in your home town with
your family, I’ve seen pictures and messages in Facebook from airports all
around the world, people boarding planes and saying goodbye to loved one, until
next time when you come back to see them.
I want to start this year’s blog looking at an interesting concept my wife
and I were discussing over a cup of coffee, which relates to my intro. Many
people I know live and work in a country or city away from their original
birthplace. Many of us moved away at an early age looking for adventure or
something of the kind. Many of us never went back as we found our fortune and
in many cases married someone and stay there. Years later we find ourselves
living away from our family, and like us, you probably visit them once a year
or whenever you can, always keeping in touch with your roots.
But when we come back “home” for those short holidays, we eat, drink and
socialise too much disrupting our routine and can’t wait to go back “home”! Our
real home where we have chosen to live and where we enjoy living; two very
different homes, both just as important.
But the conflict comes as you often feel the need to go back home
because although we cannot deny our roots and enjoy our family and friends, we
have changed. We now, as adults have 3 places where we belong:
1. Your roots
2. Your
nationality
3. Your
home
Let me explain each of them and how they relate to our lives.
Your Roots
In the purest sense this is something you cannot deny! I was born in
Mexico and I guess that makes me a Mexican. However, I come form a European
Family; my mother was a Spanish Catholic, my father came from a German Jew
family – what does that make me? I guess a bit of everything! Many of you would
have roots less complex than mine (or perhaps even more complicated!) but we
cannot get away from them, it is where we come from and where our history lays.
This will always have an influence on you but won’t necessarily make who you
are today. As I said, you cannot deny where you come from, but you may not be
attached to your roots.
Sometimes coming “home”, where our roots are, it’s hard because we may
no longer identify ourselves with our past. It doesn’t mean we no longer belong
to our roots, it means we have grown apart. I know I feel this way; going back
“home” is nice but can’t wait to go back “home”!!!!
Your Nationality
We all need to identify ourselves by a nationality that gives us a
passport. Usually your nationality is a gateway to move around the world. Many
people with mixed backgrounds and roots, posses two or more passports. But
nationality does not identify you for what you are; it merely gives you a
right, a right to live where we have chosen.
As a born Mexican I have a right to be Mexican. But I can’t recall the
last time I had a Mexican passport. That doesn’t mean I’m not Mexican (we have
established these are some of my roots) but having a Mexican passport, since I
don’t live in Mexico, has no benefits for me currently. I have a UK passport
and therefore a UK citizen. This is where I live and where I have chosen to
live. Does this mean I can call myself British? I will expand on this on the
next point.
For now, we all have a nationality, which usually ties us to where we
have chosen to live or allows us to have certain benefits. Of course most of us
would also have a Nationality that is links us to our roots. There is a strong
tie between our background and where we chose to live. For me my roots are not
tied to my nationality.
Your Home
This is perhaps the most important of the three; the one I believe actually
makes us who we are. As a young adult I moved the England and began a new
chapter of my life. A very different culture from Mexico or my roots, it took
me some time to get used to it but soon I knew this is where I wanted to make
“home” and I adapted, changed and 29 years later I call myself English. To recap,
I was born in Mexico to a Spanish Catholic and German Jew family, I have a UK
passport claiming a British Nationality and I have just called myself English!
If you want to pause for a moment and get your head rounds this please do so!
I would enjoy going back “home” after 29 years but soon I would be
asking for my flight back home! When I come to Spain, I enjoy it, but again I
long to going back home. I enjoy living my life like an Englishman. This is
where my home is, it’s not perfect, and there are aspects of it that drives me
nuts. But is there anywhere perfect? of course not! And like me, there are many
of you out there.
This can change, of course, and chose a new home. Who knows if in the
future I will move somewhere and suddenly feel at home, then I change, I become
America, Russian or Chinese! I will make my home and live my life accepting the
culture and way of living, regardless of my roots or nationality.
We are all very different, some of us will have our roots, nationality
and home where our family has lived for hundreds of years, others will have
three different facets to their lives, one root, one nationality and one home.
In the end, what matters is where you feel you belong, and this, in my opinion,
can change at any time or not at all.
Where is your home?
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