You know you are getting old when…

Take life with a bit more happiness!

You know you are getting old when your arm cannot stretch any more for you to read the small print on the pills the doctor prescribed as you went to see him for several pains and aches you have. But this is just one of many ways you know you are getting old!

Reading glasses and aches and pains are things you get used to when you get old, but what’s hard to comprehend is when you walk into a store and everyone around you is at least 30 years younger than you! And the assistant looks like he has just taken off his Scool uniform and changed to serve you (which most probably he has!). This weekend I went out to the shops as most weekends and for the first time I became acutely aware of people being tremendously younger than me (not that I am that old by the way…).

And it is incredibly uncomfortable when you go into a shop which you think you can easily wear what they sell there but everyone buy and serving has just left school! I have always been aware of getting old and made claims that I will like to grow old gracefully (I started to shave my head 10 years ago when I first notice I was starting to look like and old Maths Profesor) and when I turned 45 I named it my “half way year” (meaning I would like to get to 90 healthily and happily) and I have never had an issue with my age. So why did I suddenly become so overwhelmed by all this young people around me? I think it’s because I know that soon, I will be hitting my fifties (two years to go) and I’ve now reached an age where I cannot longer pretend to be a teenager!

And don’t get me wrong, I am a believer that you are only as old as you think, I still stand by that, but it is inevitable that eventually you will look older than most people around you and that there are certain places that will be dominated by a generation younger than you. I will of course, not stop attending this places, and by all means I will not start frequenting old pensioners’ clubs, I just need to accept and realised that from now on everyone around me could look a lot younger than me! (I guess this is why some people spend millions on plastic surgery to make them look as if they never left their 20’s)

The secret to also staying young and feeling young (even if you don’t look it) is staying in tune with what is going on around us and keep up with all technological advances so you don’t ever sound like you parents when talking to a younger shop attendant as she says to you “let me get the iPad to check if they have stock on the other store” a what? In my days you would need to call them to know what they had!

There are plenty of advantages to getting old too! This weekend I saw in a retro shop a phone my mother had going for 160 pounds! I would have thrown the old thing to the bin yet now it retails for a ridiculous price. The older we get the more attractive and expensive we become!!

Yes let’s accept that age is a graceful way of getting old and as Helen Mirren said in her recent commercial for an anti- ageing cream campaign “it has take over 60 years to look this good” I will be joining a club called “the 49ners” which a friend of mine and I thought about, when we get to the age of 49 (this year for me) we will no longer celebrate further and stay 49 for the rest of our lives! In the words of Helen Mirren… “It has taken me 49 year to look and feel this bloody good, so I’m staying put”

#Happy #2016 and may all your #wishes come true!

And we are off! 

2016 is here and the first few days are done! And I am sure your 2015 was waved goodbye with hundreds of farewell wishes and your 2016 was welcome with hundreds of good wishes and aspirations or as they are better know “New Year’s Resolutions!”

Some time ago I wrote a blog pointing out that my New Year’s resolution was to not do any more “New Years resolutions” but turn them into dreams which in term become our future realities. And if like me you want to achieve a lot in 2016, rather than calling them New Year’s resolutions call them your 2016 goals!

My son, only 14, became aware of this mystical tradition that has rule humans for hundreds of years (I’m not sure how many as I don’t know who came up with this but whoever invented New Years resolutions should be shot!) and incredibly, only at the age of 14 pointed out to me that it was crazy that people waited until the 31^st December or 1^st of January to do things they can do now, today, and he went further on to point out that you don’t need to wait to make things happened. I was ecstatic hearing this and of course agreed with him 110%!

During the festive season I took time to ponder on this. And it is incredible that many of our friends, work colleagues, family and strangers take the time to “wish you all the best for the new year” and “may all your dreams come true” through various forms of communication. One that sticks out nowadays is Facebook. Many people took the time to wish everyone all of the things they never wish for you the rest of the year and merrily inundated your Facebook feed with these post. And not wanting to sound like Scrooge (although those that know me well will know my views on the festive season) many of those well wishes were in some instances meaningless and well, seasonal. Have you ever heard of the old say “a puppy is not just for Christmas”? well I think this is a bit like this, here is my point:

Just like New Years resolutions which are seasonal and a waist of time as you should always set yourself goals throughout the year, we should not just post over the holiday season well wishes for everyone which again are meaningless and a waist of time and instead we should make an effort to keep in contact with all those people throughout the year and more importantly wish them health and happiness all of the time and not just once a year. Wouldn’t that be more meaningful and appreciative of people?

I really don’t want to say people should not celebrate Christmas, that’s not my point, like it is not too say you should not         have goals (call them New Years resolutions if you wish) but I would like to see people taking the time to check in on people more than once a year, drop them a note and wish them well in March, June and September. I would like to see people focus on goals more than once a year which become extreme and a burden, stopping people from following through with them but rather start a new goal in February, May, August and October or whenever you want to achieve something.

If you make a habit of these two things, checking in on people more than once a year and setting new goals whenever you want to achieve something, your life will take a different meaning. And remember that this will be less work than the marathon effort every year to send all those Christmas cards and making those commitments which are hard to follow.

Practicing this will make a habit and a habit becomes part of you and a life time commitment to stay in contact with friend and achieve your dreams!

Don't #reminiscent on the #past but #look #forward to the #future!

I am sure you have heard the expression “I got out of bed with the wrong foot” well this is how I feel about 2015, I think I started it with the wrong foot!

And I am not talking about my bad knee which has caused me a lot of issues since the beginning of the year and to date still not fixed. But this, together with other bits and pieces at the time didn’t help and me start 2015 with the wrong foot.

I am, by nature, a very positive person. And I believe that we all are masters of our own destiny and how we feel and think has a great influence on this destiny. After having an injury on my knee last year I decided, quite rightly, to stop running and see a specialist. As a running junky that I became, I began 2015 having withdrawal symptoms and fell into a bit of a depression. Running gave me lots of energy, making me feel alert and enthusiastic and more importantly it gave me time to think and clear my head during the exercise. Not having this, took away that moment where I could think clearly, get ideas for my writing and let some adrenaline out! I began to slowly put on weight and the next thing you know I began to feel tired, with less energy and unable to get out of bed feeling good and ready for the day. To date, I have gained almost 7 kilos and done very little writing, and every time I have to get up I feel I haven’t had enough sleep or been out parting all night (something I don’t do anymore, and I don’t think I could on my present state!)

But why am I telling you all this? It feels I am writing a letter of complaint to the weight watchers or the knee fixer up people. But in reality I have been thinking about this for a few months and this is the opportunity I have been looking for. Let me explain.

I think the last time I wrote a blog was probably three months ago. And I have not completed any scripts or stories until recently and only because I was in the annual New York Midnight script writing competition I enter every year. My knee still not better. I am struggling to loose those 7 kilos I have gained. With my knee not showing any signs of recovery, at least for the near future, and unless I go into an extreme diet, I am not likely to loose the 7 kilos I have (in fact I may gain more with the holiday season ahead of us) and I know I have to do something before the bells chime twelve times on the 31^st December and I am facing 2016.

I am not a believer on New Years Resolutions, in fact I think they are a waist of time but I do think that how I start 2016 will have a great impact on the rest of the year as I have come to learn in 2015, and I guess learned it the hard way!

I believe I have to change my attitude and face the fact that I may not be able to run again at least for a while, that I may have to find different ways to get my energy back, alternative ways to have time to clear my head and organise my thoughts to get new ideas to write blogs and scripts. I know that I want 2016 to be as productive, exiting and rewarding as previous years and it all starts with me, on that first minute of 2016 when I get out of bed with the right foot.

Back in 2013 I set myself a challenge to write a blog every week in 2014 and the previous year I wanted to write my another epic musical, in 2011 I worked on my first film script and event before that in 2010 my first ever musical! Where I failed in 2016 was not having that drive, that vision, that passion that helps us achieve things. I have been the victim of my own negativity and this drove in turn the lack of inspiration and energy.

2016 I feel like Arnold Schwarzenegger, “I’ll be back” and this time no feeling sorry for myself. I am taking the next 5 days to prepare myself to welcome 2016 with a positive attitude, an energetic outlook and inspiration to do something great.

If you, like me, are glad to see the back of 2015, then join me in forgetting about the past and looking forward to a bright and prosperous year ahead and make sure you welcome 2016 with the right foot, and that is with the right attitude, the right spirt, the right energy and the right goals, it's all about getting that right foot right!

The #ugly #face of #humans

I have always been fascinated by human behaviour (I wish I had been a bit more focused at school and I could have become a psychologist) but instead I became an actor, which, to some extends, studies human behaviour. And throughout my life I have always found interesting observing how people react in certain situations. This is particularly interesting in some places such as airplanes, trains and buses, I guess in any confined space where you have to share your personal space with others.  I have been lucky enough to have the opportunity to travel extensively over the last 8 years and this has allowed me to see and experience some of this “radical” behaviour us humans display in these confined spaces. These experiences have been the subject of many of my blogs and scripts as I have seen some things often beyond believe and you know you have to put that in a movie!

But this week I’ve been exposed to an “ugly” side of us humans I had never seen before. And I guess I had never witnessed it because like every other human, I also have this “ugly” face. And what I experienced this week made me realised how egocentric we all are and how these confined and crowded places make our behaviour change.

Two weeks ago I had a knee surgery and I was asked to rest for two week from my hectic travel. So I have been confined to the safety of my house with a sore leg and trying to get back to normal. I have always been a fairly active person so I have been dying to get back to work. On Thursday I had to go to London and I was looking forward to getting out and about. Still with one crutch in hand, I set off from my hometown to London looking forward to be back on my own two feet.

I arrived very early that morning and I decided to take the tube to work.  I was determined not to feel sorry for myself and just go slow and get there. That morning was fine, not too many people and I managed to get to my destination feeling quite accomplished and ready for my day. I guess part of the recovery process is to believe you can do things and it makes you feel good. As it had been such as success I thought I repeat the same on my way back and take the underground again… I guess I was wrong!

I do not want to pretend to know how a person with a disability must feel, I could never do that, but having a recently operated knee and limited mobility with the aid of a crutch, I never expected to encounter what I did that Thursday afternoon in the underground. I truly came face to face for the first time in my life with the “ugly” side of us human beings cutely aware of it by my temporary disability.

It was rush hour and there were, as usual, thousands of people trying to get home. And everyone has to get somewhere and everyone has their own agenda, I know, I’ve been there. And must of the time people are rushing to get the next train or bus and time is of the essence to make sure you make that departure time.  And then those who are not in a rush have their music on and close themselves in their own world, not paying attention to anything or anyone around them. I was trying to get home too, I also had my own schedule, I had left the office well in advance, as I knew it was going to take longer.

But as soon as I hit the station I began to experience this “ugly” face of human beings, wrapped in their own world and not caring for anyone else around them. Let me walk you though some of the things I experienced.

·      Ticket barrier, people push themselves to get through these as fast as they can, I had a crutch, my bag and my sore knee, I was slow getting through the barrier. I nearly got pushed to one side by a woman who clearly didn’t care I was struggling to get through this narrow space before the door would shut on my leg!

·      The escalators, people want to run down and will push their way through those who chose to stand still, I was trying to jump onto the moving step when someone brushed passed me, pushed my bag out of the way and almost made me lose my balance as I step onto the moving escalator!

·      I had to wait for three trains before I was able to board, it was crowded, and most people push themselves forward and squish themselves before the doors close. It’s hard to do this with a crutch, a bag and a sore knee! Eventually someone made a space big enough for me to be able to get on the train otherwise I think I still be there!

·      Getting off the train! That was interesting! I had my back to the door and when it opened, I did not fall backward because there is a god out there! I had to turn around, slowly and then slowly get off the train. Well a sea of people behind me push and if it hadn’t been for the person who made the space for me I think I would have been flat on my arse!

·      But the “ugliest” of all was a man I encounter going up a staircase, he takes the “ugliest” face of humans award! On the last leg (pardon the expression) of my journey there is a set of stairs you need to claim to get to the platform where I change trains. This staircase is usually crowded in one direction where everyone is going, with the exception of a few (4 or 5 people) who are travelling the opposite way. These 4 or 5 individuals usually take the side and try and make their way down pushing their way through hundreds coming the opposite way. It makes sense, no doubt, that they stick to the rail as they try to come down the steps. It only make sense until you meet someone coming the opposite direction with the hundreds of people holding onto the rail because he has a crutch on the other hand and is clearly struggling to get up the stairs. I was already exasperated by all the previous encounters and being pushed as I was not claiming the stairs fast enough when I came literally face to face with this ugly human being! He said to me “excuse me” and I looked at him and said, “I can’t move!”. He then looked at me and at this point you’d think he would have realised my predicament, so he said, “I need to get down” I paused and I thought is he serious? I looked at him and then he said again “excuse me!” so I slowly moved to one side letting go of the rail and feeling just a little bit nervous. He walked down and I then moved back and held onto the rail but of course not before two or three others pushed passed me seeing a gap and an opportunity to rush! I stopped, shocked more than anything, when I heard a person saying “are you ok? Do you need some help?” I thank them and said no and I carried on my epic journey to the coach station to get back to the safety of my home!

This experience made me realised how selfish we can be, I knew we were but not to that extent, and how these environments bring the worst in us. And I say us because I’ve been there; I am one of those commuters pushing my way through to catch the train. I am also ashamed that it has taken this experience for me to realised this “ugly’ behaviour we display every day, that it has taken for me to be in a situation many people are in permanently to realised how hard it is for them.

As a writer it has given me the ability to see another side of humans I can now relate to. As a human it has made me more aware of everything around me.  I hope this blog can help all of us to realise that we should be aware of our surroundings and know there are people out there who may need our help also get somewhere.